Mark and I had time to discuss this concept after he read through the post and had some time to think through it. There are some addendums we really think are critical to this kind of subject matter.
First of all, communication is key. If I am annoyed with Mark because he isn't being attentive enough to my needs (i.e. expectations), it's much healthier if I communicate with him about how we can get better about it. Sometimes resolving my annoyance means developing a "no expectations" stance on the matter. Other times it may mean that he needs to try harder, do better, whatever. I tend to get re-annoyed when he commits to doing better but makes the same kind of error again and again.
Another HUGE thing is that "acts of service" is my love language. It is critical to my happiness that Mark does things for me. Knowing what makes you happy and brings you peace and joy will dramatically change the way you implement the principles of the article.
Having said those things, I married Mark because he promised to be the best man he could be for me. I would be lying if I didn't have expectations. He would not be good for me if he didn't have expectations of himself. Sometimes we fail to satisfy each other, and that is when we kick back and remember our relationship to each other was designed by God to make us winners. We are determined to weather storms, to stay humble, to lower our expectations, all in order to love each other more and hold on more tightly to our responsibility to each other.
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